terrorists of love

we'd been told that after the days of sweetness and light, where the elder sibling makes nice with the new baby, the proverbial shit hits the fan.

i'm hoping the following communications mean that time has come and gone.

just for posterity's sake, a recounting of the bizarre two days the tuesday after my last posts, via texts from kris:

3:13 p.m.

He pissed all over bed, orangie, [his plush dr. seuss doll] and then apparently over side bc there was a puddle on floor and his dragon ride was dripping wet. I have changed him and the bed and put him back in it. No tee tee [video] tonight and i'm going to let him lie in there now as long as it takes, even if he pees all over the damn room.

i responded that we were going to have to stop putting him in zippered sleepers, thinking he knows how to take them off now.

4:11 p.m.

Um, he was wearing pants. I had to change him into zips.

i went back to the sports department, where a couple of the staffers had sons. they'd had similar experiences of their boys removing their diapers to water their surroundings, they assured me.

i relayed this to kris.

5:58 p.m.

How about the insane hitting and tantrums?

i didn't bother following up. then a revelation:

7:13 p.m.

A night without orangie, oh my. He asked, but i think he understands bc he did not protest. I told him bc he peed on him, he's got to take a bath. He has tigger instead. We shall see.

consequences! he recognizes them!

then, checking on her after a late shift ...

11:47 p.m.

He was fine. She's being... Herself. Oy.

and then ...

12:31 a.m

She is never going to fucking sleep. I'm gonna fucking die.

next day, i text to see if there's any improvement:

6:17 p.m.

Yeah, we're fine. Sorry. Watching harold [and the purple crayon cartoon] before bed.

progress! and then ...

7:23 p.m.

Ok for real somebody needs to ask rick [atkinson, airport manager] about these low-flying planes. I really thought that one was coming through our roof.

i learned later that said planes had awakened boy.

8:05 p.m.

Your children are psycho. Felix is wearing bib overalls to sleep until further notice, by the way. I'm not cleaning up piss anymore. Seriously, they're insane. All 3 of them.

she included the cat as a contributor to the madness.

and to close ...

8:21 p.m.

No- fuck it. He can wear the damn uncomfortable demit bias [denim bibs] until he stops acting like a turd. That's what he's being. He said his name for the first time tonight, the little turd. To mock me! As in, 'oh, felix!' when i saw the mess. And now girl is out of her mind. Just fuck.

but -- because she is a genius, kris hit upon the idea of putting the boy in a onesie so as to block easy access to his diaper via the zippered sleepers.

no pissing from the crib so far.